What gives Glee? This time last year on the Fox musical comedy, all anyone at McKinley High could talk about was graduation. Will Rachel get in to NYADA? Will Kurt get in to NYADA? Are Brittany and Puck actually going to graduate? And what the heck does Finn want to do with his life? But with only five episodes left this season - Glee returns next Thursday, April 11 at 9/8c - there's been nary a mention of D(iploma) day. Unfortunately, the New Directions' Class of 2013 is apparently too busy singing and spit-swamping to worry about what will happen to them after high school. Lucky for Blaine, Tina, Artie, Brittany and Sam, TVGuide.com has already masterfully carved out their next moves.
Blaine (Darren Criss) The newly reinstalled Cheerio has had a rough senior year ever since he cheated on Kurt with some random from Facebook. And, as much as we should probably hate to say it, it's been fun to watch the boy wonder suffer after his slow evolution into a smug, self-righteous bore in Season 3. Even Criss said last year that he wanted to see the silver-spooned Blaine have to actually work for something. So why not admit Blaine into NYADA, but really struggle to really find his place? Aside from her sex-ified makeover and the feisty Cassandra July, Rachel found her niche pretty quickly and a majority of Kurt's scenes have been based at home. Blaine has never shown quite the same passion for singing, so let him get into NYADA, but place him at the bottom of most of his classes, the way most A students have to adjust to not being teacher's pet their first day in college.
Tina (Jenna Ushkowitz) Oh, Tina, Tina, Tina. A year ago, fans would have loved nothing more than to follow the soft-spoken glee club pushover to the big city to follow her dream of singing, and subsequently find her real voice. But a funny thing happened on the way to senior year. Tina got dumped, got bitter and became an intolerable prima donna that nobody likes. At first, fans crossed their fingers that it was just a phase, much like the sporadic appearances of Coach Sue's soft side, but seven months later, it appears Mean Tina is here to stay. Maybe living in New York would take Tina down a few notches, but there's no amount of humble pie Cassandra July could force down her throat to make her likeable again. Tina and her attitude might be a good fit at a small liberal arts school, where she could continue being the big fish at a small (but acclaimed) glee club. Just please let it be a school far away from Lima so she can make like Mercedes, and leave the show for good. You can thank us later, Blaine.
Page 2 of 3 - Artie (Kevin McHale) Artie's career path is the clearest of all the seniors: directing. And as last year's wacky black-and-white Christmas special first showed, he definitely has a unique vision to share with the world. Since NYADA is - spoiler alert! - a fictional school, there is no way of knowing if any sort of directing program is available there. So why not instead ship Artie off to one of the Big Apple's other major film schools like NYA, Columbia or even New York Film Academy and allow him to hone his craft? The show has never taken full advantage of Artie's potential, but at least this way he could play a strong supporting role in the New York adventures of last year's seniors. We're sure budding actress Rachel could use someone like Artie to run lines with!
Brittany (Heather Morris) Second time appears to be the charm for fifth-year senior Brittany after she failed to pass her senior year last season. Although no one is probably more excited to get out of Lima than the star of Fondue for Two, Brittany is a good utility player to keep around post-high school a la Santana and Finn (minus those sweater vests). Of all the current seniors, Brittany has formed the closest bond with the underclassmen thanks to her collaboration with Kitty on the Cheerios and her budding friendship with Marley. Most importantly, the show will be sorely lacking in comic relief without her. Sure, the new kids have had a traumatic year - Bulimia! Dyslexia! Whatever it is that makes Kitty such a wench! - but they're going to need to learn how to lighten the mood somewhere down the line, and Brittany is the best candidate for the job. So let's send her to Lima's nearest community college and call it a day. Moving Brittany into more of a mentor-esque role instead of a performer would also be beneficial if Morris is indeed preggers.
Sam (Chord Overstreet) Considering he managed to get such a horrific SAT score, it must first be recognized that there is a very good chance McKinley High's charming student body vice president might not graduate at all. But instead of having Trouty Mouth copy Brittany's path, why not take advantage of his extremely impressive student body and make Sam use his "White Chocolate" stripping past to his advantage in New York? He could just barely graduate, not get into college and then go to the big city and be a Naked Cowboy-esque street performer to pay the bills. At night, he could explore his passion for performing, and specifically for comedy, by taking classes at a famous improv school like Upright Citizens Brigade or The Pit. It took two years for the Glee writers to figure out how to take full advantage of Sam's charisma, wit and six-pack, so why stop now? Glee returns next Thursday, April 11, at 9/8c on Fox. What do you want the seniors to do next?